Stinky Germans

We were sitting at our favourite cafe today when Miss J announced, very loudly, "I don't like Germans. They are yucky and stinky and I want them to go away forever."
After I stopped choking... I replied, "People from Germany are people, just like us J. They come from a different place, that's all."
Miss J, "They're not proper people, they're Germans! And they should go back away, and not come and be pesky and sick and disgusting near us."
Me, "People aren't pesky or sick just because they come from somewhere else."
Miss J, "Yeah, Germans are too stinky and annoying and grose! We should catch them all and send them away, 'sept we're not allowed, are we?"

At this point we had the attention of the entire cafe.
The entire German cafe.

Me, "No Miss J, we are definitely not allowed. That would be very mean and unfair. We can't make other people go away because we don't like them, and coming from a different country isn't a reason not to like another person..."
Miss J, "Not people, stinky GERMANS!"
Me, "Miss J, people from Germany are still people!"
Miss J, "No mum - GERMANS!"

Then she made the sign for "mouse" and I nearly passed out with relief.

"OH.. You mean VERMIN!"

"Ye-ah. Stinky vermin."

Mothers Day is Everyday

Here in the kewl house we don't really celebrate Mothers Day. It's just not something that 'clicks' with me, so I choose not to make a big deal out of it.

This afternoon we stopped at the shops on the way home and the attendant asked the girls if they had a nice mothers day yesterday.
Miss J asked, "What's that?"
The (slightly baffled) attendant explained that, "Mothers day is a day when you give your mum lots of cuddles and do special things to tell her you love her."

Miss J replied, "Oh, we do that everyday!"

So true. And so kewl.

Wishing all you mums out there happy everydays.

James and the olive branch

It's a beautiful day here today. The sun is out and there is a cool breeze, just perfect for playing outside. We spent the morning hanging out with the horses, then Miss J helped Miss V wash the dogs (ie. attack them with the hose) while Miss F wandered around taking photos.

We weathered a minor storm from Miss F when it was time to head back inside for lunch. She cracked it big time when I got up to go inside. "But MUM! (Insert unintelligible wailing here) MUM! WAIT!" I figured it was just the fallout from an unsettled week, so I let her scream it out. She joined us at the table fairly quickly and she seemed to have calmed herself down, even if she was still shooting me filthy looks.

After lunch I decided I'd had enough filth for one day, so I hooked the camera up to the computer, olive branch style, and asked Miss F to show me her photos.
Her 67 photos, to be precise.

Olive branch accepted, the show began - complete with running commentary.
Twenty three of them were of "Al holding Misster Baskey Ball", and they looked something like this:

The rest of them were of "James", and they looked like this:

Oh yeah, Miss F was really working that olive branch.

I sat through forty four photos of grass.
Not only that, I pretended to be interested in every single one of them.
Am I kewl, or what?

Yeah, I am. So kewl I was about to delete every last blade - Then I had a brain wave...

"Miss F, who is James?"
"That's James..." She pointed at the screen.
"Where?"
"There..." She pointed again.
"Show me one more time?"

"Right there!"

"Oh KEWL!"

"Ye-ah. That was right before you dropped Misster Basskey Ball on him."
She flung me a look so filthy I'll be cleaning dirt out of my ears for weeks.

Oh dear.

The unintelligible wailing suddenly became intelligible.

"But MUM! You just squished James! MUM! WAIT!"

And with that, Miss F let go of the olive branch and it flicked back and thwacked me on the forehead.

Not kewl, mum.

Do you know self defence?

Last week I found myself in a dangerous situation.
In front of me stood a person with a knife, angry and desperate and unwell.
Behind me was the hallway leading to where my girls lay awake in their beds.

Basic self defence moves allowed me to deflect an advance and remove the knife from the equation. I came out of that dangerous situation with two stitches and three scared, but otherwise safe children.
It could have been much worse.

When you learn self defence you hope that you never actually need to use your skills, but it is always better to be safe than sorry.
As a woman, self defence is an empowering skill to have for yourself.
As a mum it could be crucial for your children's safety.

So do you know self defence?

Pip and Ray!

We turned the corner and the road changed from asphalt to dirt. We drove up hill a little way, then turned another corner and drove over a stretch of potholes. Then we slowed, turned into our driveway and began our decent home. Right on cue, three sleepy children stirred from the back seat.

Miss J said, "Hi house! We're ho-ome!"
Miss V signed "home" and clapped her hands happily.
Miss F yelled, "Pip!" and we all shouted, "RAY!!!"
Nelly was so excited she peed before she got out of the car. I didn't get annoyed though - I knew how she felt.
When we walked in our front door again for the first time since last Friday, I sprang a leak too (I cried. Just in case you needed reassuring).

"Happy tears, mum?"
"Yes Miss F. Blissful and relieved and VERY happy tears."
"OK. Just checking."

Things have been a little unsettled for us lately. We had an unexpected guest, got thrown some unexpected challenges, had some unexpected outcomes and went on an unexpected road trip.
And you know what?
I've decided I like 'expected'!

But we're home now, and I have just one thing left to say...

Pip....

Sunrise

Today is Photo Challenge day over at Mountaingirls Musings.

This week's theme is 'light', which for this post translates to 'sunlight', and then to 'sunrise'. Creativity is part of the challenge, right?

These photos also come with a story.

On the second anniversary of M's death, I went to our favourite place in the world and I watched the sun rise.

There is something so incredibly sacred about those moments, right at the beginning of new day. Like the entire universe is holding it's breath.
Slowly the sun rises, we begin again, and the universe exhales.

As I sat waiting for the sun to come up that morning, my grief felt like a heavy weight in my chest, pinning me to the bottom of the ocean.
I realised I'd been holding my breath for too long. My world had become dark and cold and lonely - And I realised it was time to rise, to begin again, and to exhale.

I took a breath, and I began to hum. I didn't recognise the tune at first, but when it came to me I smiled.

On the second anniversary of M's death, I went to our favourite place in the world, I watched the sun rise, and I sang.

And you probably don't want to hear tomorrow's another day

Well I promise you you'll see the sun again

And you're asking me why pain's the only way to happiness

And I promise you you'll see the sun again

I promise you you'll see the sun again.

Precious

I ran into S, a work colleague and friend, in town today. She is a fabulous, loud, over the top, light up the room, best friends with everyone kind of gal. When we get together the results tend to be somewhat, well, loud and over the top. Today was no exception.
After we air kissed about a hundred times she announced to the world that she was wearing her "washing day undies" and they were currently "exploring the great divide". Then she unleashed her affections on the girls.

F and J have met her before and they both adore her. They giggled and twirled and air kissed like there was no tomorrow.
It was a new experience for Miss V though, and my kewl, calm and collected little earth girl was not so impressed.

S: "Who's this little cherub then?! Aren't you just the most precious little gorgie porgie thing I've ever seen?!!"

Miss V: "No. I'm V. And you're standing too close."

Darling S was speechless.