When a little girl tells her new favourite uncle that her favourite colour is pink and her favourite animal is her white pony - Do not be surprised if you wake up the next morning to find said white pony has turned a brilliant shade of magenta.
Also, do not be surprised if there are no beetroots left within a 10km radius.
If someone tells you to "lighten up", do not reply "make me". Unless you want to be woken at 3am by 4 spotlights shining into your tent.
Circus freaks do not make good show and tell guests. Especially when you're a teacher, not a student, and the freaks rock up to class wearing t-shirts that read, "I was born smart, but education ruined me."
If, whilst you are grocery shopping in town, you see 6 freaks flash past on a ride on mower that looks an awful lot like your own - It probably is.
It is also probably best to walk very quickly in the opposite direction.
When your children call to you, "Mum! Quick! Freaky Uncle has four fingers stuck up his nose!"... They are probably not lying.
Especially if Freaky Uncle was last seen with the super glue.
A freak attempting to contort herself into a kitchen cupboard because another freak says "I bet you can't fit in there any more".... Is probably not going to end well.
But it will probably be very entertaining.
We are home. We are adjusting. We are celebrating the joyous moments and allowing time for the crappy moments to pass.
I am under close observation by Miss J after getting into trouble for not taking small enough bites of my apple... "Baby can't swallow big bits mum! You'll choke him!"
Miss F has taken it upon herself to educate the world as to how babies are born. I just know the doctor was thrilled to learn that... "Baby is going to come out of mum's vagina, you know."
Miss V is refusing to eat watermelon after one of the freaks convinced her that Baby is actually a watermelon growing in my tummy - because I swallowed a pip and drank lots of water to make it grow.
Thank you for the supportive comments and good vibes.
They are better than chocolate!