8:30pm
Mobile phone rings
Unknown number
Me, ".... Hello..?"
Telemarketer, ".................................................. Hello. Mrs [Insert badly pronounced surname here]?"
Me, "Maybe.... What are you selling....?"
Telemarketer, "Congratulation! (No, that's not a typo, he said congratulation without the s) You have been randomly selected to receive a free anniversary gift from company X [I asked said company to join us for this blog post, sadly, they declined).
Me, "Oooohhh a freebie! My husband will be thrilled when he forgets to buy me something!"
Telemarketer, "You can have an anniversary night to remember with our free sample of [some drug thing that enhances sexual function in men]."
Me, "No way!!! Really?!?!"
Telemarketer, "Yes. Let me tell you a bit about our product. It is all natur...."
Me, "Mate - If you can give my husband a hard on for the night, I will give you a million dollars!"
Telemarketer, "Er... What is his dysfunction?"
Me, "Death."
[Silence]
Me, "What...... Is that a problem?"
Telemarketer, "Umm.. Sorry to bother you..."
[Dial tone]
Honestly... Telemarketers these days have no stamina.
I support the Teddy Tour .com
Breaking the silence surrounding childhood sexual assault
Daddy Kewl
Four years gone, but ever present in mind and spirit
For Zy, Our Warrior
The story of a surrogate pregnancy and our Warrior Baby, Zy.
One Second
It only takes one second to save a life. When it's up to you, will you make your second count?
About Me
- Alison
- I'm Alison, and my three most important little people are Miss J, twin sister of Miss F - both 4 going on 14 and big sisters to Miss V - who is an impressive 3 years old and anything but the 'baby' of the family.
No doubt I will find it impossible to stick to one theme for this blog, so here is some background info that will hopefully add some sense the inevitable random posts...
The man of our family, M, is no longer with us in body though he is ever present in mind and spirit.
I used to be active in the performing arts 'scene' - Less so now as my girls take centre stage. Creativity is still a huge part of life, though being directed by three toddlers the art form is somewhat different.
I'm always passionate about dramatic arts and creative expression, especially as a tool for inclusion... Bringing me to my next point of focus - Awareness and acceptance of people with diverse abilities. I work with people of all abilities doing anything from playing drama games, making music, talking, teaching, learning and always having fun.
I guess one theme I CAN stick to is that last point - having fun. Living a joyful life is the greatest success, I feel.
9 comments:
Oh Lord - this even made me giggle the second time around. You are outrageous! I bet that dude is scarred for life..
:-)
BB
That is what you call Laydown Misere (and I wonder what the telemarketer's blog post looks like this morning?)
ROFL... that is the best telemarketer comeback I've EVER heard!!! fabulous!
This is just the laugh I needed tonight!
That is fabulous!!!!!!!
what a comeback!!!!ROFL!!!
Exactly what every telemarketer deserves :)
I just can't get over the fact that telemarketers can contact you on your cell phones. They can't here. Yet.
Oh.My.God.
Briliant! Bloody brilliant!!
I'll remember it next time I get hassled by one of those telemarketers. I wonder if "Divorce" will have quite the same impact!
xoxo
!!!! Very well done!!! :-))
(Stepping in from MissyBoo´s place)
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